5/14/04

I am sitting in the tiny Sawyer airport waiting for our damaged plane to be fixed so that I can finally get to my mother’s house. Drinking watered down French Vanilla cappuccino, which I didn’t even know I liked until NMU, and eating an oversized rice crispy bar, both from the vending machines in this tiny terminal.

So I decided to take this time sitting here to work on my poor neglected website. Basically my eyes can’t handle reading the book I brought along because I am very sleepy after the ordeal Kaleb and I have gone through in the past couple of days. It’s the last book in the Ender series by Card. Children of the Mind. Great series.

What a couple days Kaleb and I have had. Wednesday Kaleb and I dropped off his resume at MI Works for this computer technician job. If you are reading this please pray that God’s will be done with our finances. Anywho, after we got done with that we headed off to Green Bay where I was supposed to fly out of the next morning.

So...Green Bay...it starts storming. You know, one of those great spring storms that you can only really experience in the upper midwest. Kaleb and I had a great time in the hotel room. It was tiny, but it was nice and private. It was just good to spend some time by ourselves. He really is my best friend and I miss him already.

Anywho, after dropping our poor dilapidated laptop off at Best Buy for repairs, Kaleb and I went searching for a Perkins at my request so that I could stay awake with him a little longer. When we got back to the hotel room the phone kept ringing...and then when I would pick up no one would be there. So I called the front desk...which is apparently exactly what they wanted me to do...I had a message from home that my flight for the next morning...the one we had driven all the way to Green Bay, WI for...had been CANCELED!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!

Ok, so things are alright...we just got the flight rescheduled to go through Marquette on Friday so that Kaleb won’t have to go to Green Bay to pick me up. Sounds like a good plan right??

Well here I am in Marquette. Apparently the computer that operates on of the engines isn’t working...so we are delayed about three hours.

I suppose I will get to Sioux Falls eventually. As long as I have time for a nap, that will be good. I brought my cane on this trip just in case...hopefully I will not need it. I try to psyche myself up and tell myself that my body is just like everyone else’s, but then I have an episode like I did Thursday night where I have to take baby steps just to keep myself moving, and reality hits. Something is wrong with my body. I am different. No amount of denial will fix that.

Well enough rambling for now I suppose. I am going to get more watered down cappuccino.

Love in Christ,

Hannah Rae Tuimala

3/10/04

Good things. Praise God for lots of providing. For one, Kaleb and I are planning on getting our own place in mid spring. That is exciting and necessary. Also, I got a job. At Arcadia health care as a home health aid. That is exciting too, but it will mean a lot of driving, which is why my third happy thing is so happy. I was offered a job at a local day care center. I have an interview tomorrow. I am very excited by this because it is a small, in home facility, but very professional. The woman who owns/runs it believes in a lot of the same philosophies that I do, including using ASL.

Anywho, things are good. Jeremy, Ian, and Jody are coming to visit in two weeks. I am so excited. It will be good times.

Also, I am going to add a new page of recipes. Mom’s chocolate chip cookies will be on it soon. YUM!!! And butterscotch cake. Another essential. But it will take a few days. :)

Sad thing. We had all of our male baby degus die. They got sick because their cage was to moist. At least that’s the only thing I can figure. :( So now I have to figure out what to do with Arvo. If anyone wants a goofy male degu...I have one who needs a good home.

Eva is learning lots of new tricks. I need to get some new pics of her. She is so beautiful, and LARGE...but very good. :)

Anywho, God bless to all

Hannah

2/26/04

“Stop trying to solicit me!!!” -Kaleb Tuimala, when Hannah was getting to romantic.

Saw The Passion of Christ last night. Very good movie. If you are a Christian who needs a little reminder of why we live differently...go see this movie. Everything was done very tastefully and realistically, although there were still some historical details that were changed because of familiarity....such as Jesus working with wood as a carpenter when he was most likely more of a stone carver....or putting the nails through the palms because of traditional dipiction.

For any of you who are studying Latin, or are interested in Biblical languages, this movie is AWESOME! As Kaleb told me, “ You forget that the subtitles are even there.”

As for gore, it was definatley a brutal movie, but none of that was Mel Gibson’s fault. I read the gospel of John the day before we went to see it just to refresh my memory so that I knew exactly when each blow was coming. (Just for your information John is not a very detailed description, so Matthew or Luke would be better for this purpose.) The hardest thing to watch was the brutal whipping scene. No wonder they didn’t need to break Jesus’ legs, after a beating like that I am shocked he lived through the walk up the hill.

Anywho, go see it. Invite your unbelieving friends, and those who are struggling. It’s more then hype.

In other news, please pray for me because I have been very weak lately and missing a significant amount of school because of need for sleep. On the days I crash I sleep about 18 hours and then go to sleep again that night. I am really falling behind in Latin. It’s aggravating because I just have no energy.

We are going to Ann Arbor for break. I am ecstatic because we get to watch Grace, Minna, and Vincent on Monday and Tuesday, which we wanted to do anyway, and get paid for it, extra bonus!

Anywho, Love you all. Pray for each other.

Hannah Rae Tuimala

2/21/04

“Perhaps he was the pervious incarnation of Billy      Graham” - David Erickson in Latin class

I wish that I could think of clever ways to put things like Ian does on his journal page. Oh well, I guess I am just better at saying what I mean. Not that Ian isn’t good at that, just that I suck at putting things into clever words.

School is going well. We have a break coming up next week which I am excited about because we are going to Ann Arbor to visit my baby sitting kids and our pastor and such. Plus, being in a city atmosphere will be fun. Thank you Dilaura’s.

I have 100% in my two Early Childhood classes, which I am very proud of. My goal is to not get a single point off this semester. It may seem lofty, but I have already had child psych, so these classes are just review classes for me.

Anywho, puppy is getting big. There are pictures of her and other cute animals of ours on my pictures page.

Please pray for our living situation. Living here at grandma’s is stressful and we need to find our own place soon. Also pray for Kaleb, that he will have the courage to leave the past behind so that he can begin to heal. The same goes for Kaleb’s father. He is really in a lot of pain in his heart right now. We just need to know God’s path that He wants us to travel.

Also, Kaleb’s business is getting underway, so if you or anyone you know needs computer help, or a custom computer built, sAnItY lOsS is the place to go. ;) Just a little promo there. :)

Anywho, all is well. God continues to bless us everyday. Including some unexpected money that came through the school that will help Kaleb get the tools he needs and pay for car expenses etc... Praise the Lord for that!.

Love to all.

Hannah

1/28/04 9:03 PM

Long time since I’ve written. I apologize to all those who like to read this frequently. I’ve finally gotten my picture problems fixed... so all pics in the photo gallery are working. So many things have happened in the past month.

First, Kaleb and I have moved up north to the UP of Michigan. For any of you who don’t know what the UP is (like I didn’t before I met Kaleb) It is the upper peninsula above Michigan. It is also the snowiest place in the country besides Alaska. We are enjoying it up here. We have transferred to Northern Michigan University and are attending half time this semester to ease into things. I am enrolled in the early childhood program and am really enjoying. When I am finished with my degree I will be able to teach up to second grade in most states ( not MI of coarse.) ;) My professor that is the head of the program is an incredible woman who really has a passion for children. She and I will have some conflicts when it comes to the nature of children, so I may just have to drag good ole’ Dr. Dobson into class. :)

We are living with Kaleb’s g-ma and father which has its ups and downs. This family just communicates differently that I am used to, and it has created some tension. Plus, living with a stubborn 84 year old Finn is never easy all of the time. But we have a roof over our heads and plenty of food to eat, so we are doing what we can around the house to earn our stay.

An exciting things happened about three weeks ago, for those of you who didn’t get my mass e-mail. My father-in-law was going to feed the animals when he heard what he thought at first was a kitten. He realized that the sound was coming from the dog house of the family’s 13 year old dog, Annie. What he found amazed him. A rather large, black puppy, screaming her little lungs out. Sadly, he also found 8 other puppies frozen stiff. They just happened to be born on the COLDEST night of the year. The amazing thing is, is that Annie has never even gone into heat as far as we know. We didn’t even know she was pregnant. She is 13 and this was her first litter. She didn’t know what to think of the puppy. She wasn’t even producing any milk. So for the past three weeks I have been mama to this little ( actually very big) black puppy that we have named Eva.(Eva means life in Hebrew) She is obviously part lab, which doesn’t surprise us at all since the neighbor down the street got a lab puppy last year. She turned three weeks on Tuesday and has started the process of being weaned. Man is she a little Piggy. She is almost 7 lb. now. She seems to grow exponentially...which is probably why she sleeps so much.

Anywho, besides our car’s gasket going kaput... all else is well. Please pray for our finances, as we really don’t want to owe any more money. Pray for Kaleb’s business, that it will be received well and prosper. Pray for the job opportunity I have with Arcadia health care, that all will go smoothly and that I will be hired soon where ever God wants me.

Also, if you know anyone who would like a pair of baby degus, e-mail me.

Love in Christ,

Hannah Rae Tuimala

12/07/03

Kids do and say weird things. This has been very apparent in the past few days.

Weird thing #1

I was baby sitting Grace, Minna and Vincent on Friday. We were playing down in the basement and I was laying on my side playing the little xylophone when Minna ( the two year old) sits on me and starts making funny faces. I asked her “ Minna what are you doing?” she says “ I am pretending to go poopy. Hannah is a potty.” I looked at her. “ I am what?” “ A potty! Gotta flush the Hannah.” so I put up my hand and she pushes it down as I make flushing noises...just to humor her. I have to say...I have played house many times...I have been a horsey...a cow...a chair sure...but a potty??? Never been that before.

Weird thing #2

Again...Kaleb and I were baby sitting last night...two older kids...Michael and Angela. It was about an hour before their bed time and Angela wanted to play sardines. I really didn’t want to play so I said that grown-ups aren’t very good at sardines cuz we can’t hide well. Michael then piped up and said, “ I’ve played sardines with a bunch of nuns before.” It may not seem that funny...but it was in the moment. Just the thought of a bunch of nuns in full garb playing sardines....wowie!

Weird thing #3

Of coarse it is about that time of year when churches put up nativity scenes. The scene at our church has figures about 3 or 4 feet tall made of plastic. These just happened to make good play mates for our pastor’s younger son Sean. His mother and I were talking when his older brother came running up to the door and shouted to his mother, “ Mom, Sean just hit a wiseman with a snowball.” Cathy ( Pastor Mike’s wife) then leaned out the door and I hear her shout “ Sean, don’t assault Mary and Joseph! NO! You leave baby Jesus ALONE!” Kinda had to be there too. :)

Any way...those are my funny stories. Kaleb and I are doing well...getting ready for our big move. Be praying for us and for our pastor as he makes some big decisions.

Love in Christ,

Hannah Rae Tuimala

12/2/03

"Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD , saying, 'The LORD is witness between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever.'” 1 Samuel 20:42

Friends are good things. Yes they are. Why are all of mine so far away. Laura and I have been talking a lot lately. that has been really good for me. I really feel like someone is remembering me. That is really cool. Andy, thank you so much for remembering me too. I know I am loved.

Tonight was cool cuz I was talking to Ian, and Erin, and Laura, and Andy, and my sister Sarah, and my friend David. I felt very loved. I got my homework done somewhere in b/w there, which made me feel magical.

My friend Anika is going back to Germany. That makes me very sad. I won’t have much more time to witness to her. She trusts me so much with things that I don’t expect her to trust me with. She has definitely been a blessing in my life. Pray for her. I need to do that more. For all of you. I need to pray more.

Kaleb is sick. He has been for a week. IT SUCKS! I haven’t been able to kiss him in a freakin WEEK! Do you know how long that is in Hannah time??? AHHHHHH!!! He can’t breathe! The means no kissing...and definitely no sex....very hard for me to handle. Just the sight of him is driving me nuts. I know he is there, and yet I can’t kiss him, I can’t make love to him. HE SMELLS SO GOOD DAMNIT! Hehehe...giggle...giggle...giggle...

11/24/03 2:25 AM

“How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart?” Psalm 13:2

We truly are our worst enemies aren’t we? I really don’t understand myself sometimes. I have really been struggling with self-image issues lately. The mindset of my anorexia seems to be creeping up on me. I hate it. I just want to tell it to leave me forever, and I do, and I feel better, and then it creeps up on me again. I don’t understand. How can I think of myself like that? So wretched and horrible? I read the verses in the Bible about how God sees me, and I think to myself, “well that’s all well and good, but the world sees me this way.” WHY SHOULD I FLIPPIN CARE HOW THE WORLD SEES ME??? I don’t understand. My spirit is fighting with my flesh so violently. HELP! OH, help...

On other matters, I am struggling with maternalness again. So much so that I am trying to almost fake myself into believing that I might be pregnant just for that hope. Of coarse I am not, but just to have that hope for a moment. I don’t understand. Why do these tears flow for a person who doesn’t even have a single cell yet? Someday...someday I will get my Kiva and my Samuel...but When?? How do I learn to wait? These words tonight are basically a prayer written for the world to see...because I don’t care anymore who sees them.

I need friends. I am missing Jeremy, and Ian, and Laura so terribly. I am never home when I can call them...because they all go to bed so damn early. I need them so desperatley. Kaleb can’t be my only friend. He can’t handle it. I have Jesus, Kaleb...and no one else that I can really depend on. Why do I have to be such a people person?? I am so needy. Sigh.

I suppose I should try and get some sleep. At least in sleep I can dream that I am not as alone as I feel when I am awake.

I miss you guys....so much....

11/20/03 12:49 AM

I am attempting to get to sleep before 2 AM tonight. Kaleb has zonked out which is unusual. Even on nights he is tired he usually doesn’t try to sleep until 2. Oh well. More time for me to work uninterrupted. :)

The degus keep escaping. Arvo is a little escape artist. He likes to hide in the clothes in the bathroom, so he doesn’t go to far. As long as he doesn’t chew on our post he will be okay. They (posts that is) have arsenic in them, so we would have a dead chileno rodent on our hands. Lila is expecting again. I love baby anything, but baby degus are particularly cute. Look on the links page for a web site on degus.

I guess I am out of words for now...so i will stop writing. Good night.

11/19/05 1:34 AM

Weird day today. Slept until 3. That was a good thing. I’ve been working on this site nearly all day, besides when Kaleb and I were galavanting about. I love going to the mall with him. Especially since it’s almost always his suggestion. The girls envy me.

Next week is Thanks Giving. I am SOOOOO excited because we are going to my brother’s and get to spend nearly a whole week with them. Whether they are excited about this or not, I am not sure. Abi is talking a lot now, from what Dave tells me, so it will be fun to get to know her better. Of coarse, Kaleb and I are taking full advantage of the wonder that is Gabriel Bros while we are there. Kaleb has grown like a whole inch this year, and he needs MORE new pants. He just got some from Gabriel Bros this summer that were long on him, and now they barely cover his ankles. Go figure. Guys are weird.

I think I shall go to bed soon. My brain just seems to be coming up with to many new ideas. I think I will send out the link to this site to all of my family and friends and such before I go to bed. I am so proud of myself.

Another reason I am proud of myself: I got a 95% on my child psych test today. Hoohah! :)

11/18/03 5:45 AM

I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O LORD , make me dwell in safety. ( Psalm 4:8)

Tired. Well, that’s just the thing, I should be tired. I’ve been up since 1:00 PM yesterday and I still can’t sleep. So, I am working on my web site. I am really enjoying this. It’s Hannah Friendly.

So, what I am going to do about this sleep thing? Usually my CFS lets me sleep where ever when ever. I have Child Psych at 11:30...AHHH...I can’t miss that!

Anywho, I am anxious about a few things. I am really excited about moving to the UP. Kaleb and I were brainstorming all weekend about his business. We are both so encouraged that this is what God wants us to do. He will bless us I know. Everything just seems to be falling into place.

I am finding it really hard to spell the simplist words correctly right now. Sleep...such an odd thing.

The other thing I am anxious about, as usual, I am going through a baby craze right now. AHHH!! Horomones? Sentimentality? What the crap is going on? I can barely go a day without crying because I want a child( of my own) in my arms. I keep asking Kaleb questions about children and baby names etc...he just laughs at me and tells me “ soon enough.” Grrr...I hate “soon enough.” I haven’t been this impatient since I was waiting for Kaleb and I to finally be able to be together.

Prayer is good, but I think a puppy would help too. A cute little one. Yes, puppies are good.